What is contained here are the best Bender moments, arguably the finest in Futurama. Everyone's favorite alcoholic, whore-mongering, chain-smoking gambler with Latin charm is the greatest Robot of the Futurama universe. "I'm sick of Parallel Bender lording his cowboy hat over me."
Best of Bender
104 Love’s Labour Lost
Leela: I may have loved Zapp if he wasn’t a pompous dimwit who tried to kill me.
Bender: You really are too picky, Leela.
109 Hell is Other Robots
Bender: Hey, do I preach to you when you’re lying stoned in the gutter? No! So beat it.
Bender: Hey, what kinda party is this? There's no booze and only one hooker.
105 Fear of a Bot Planet
Bender: I love this planet! I've got wealth, fame, and access to the depths of sleaze that those things bring.
112 When Aliens Attack
Bender: Single female lawyer, fighting for her client. Wearing sexy miniskirts, and bein self-reliant. Single female lawyer, havin lots of sex.
113 Fry and the Slurm Factory
Bender: That’s no lady
Robot transvestite: Damn chico, one more upgrade and I’ll be more lady than you can handle! Why you so stupid, stupid?
Bender: Bite my shiny metal ass.
Robot Transvestite: You couldn’t afford it, honey!
Raging Bender-Season 2
Bender: Im just an ex-con trying to go straight and get my kids back.
Lesser of Two Evils-Season 2
Bender: It’s a little thing called style. Maybe you should look it up sometime!
A Bicyclops Built For Two-Season 2
Bender: Leela is experiencing the greatest joy a woman can feel: worshipping some low-life jerk.
Fry: He may be a low-life jerk, but I don’t trust him.
How Hermes Requisitioned His Groove Back
Hermes: I’m going to jump.
Bender: Do a Flip!
LaBarbara: Husband, no!
Hubert Farnsworth: No Hermes. Use a method that won’t damage your liver. Other people need it, you know!
Bender Gets Made-Season 2
Bender: Sorry I’m late, old bean. I was just enjoying a tasty watercress sandwich.
Bender: Oh, I don’t feel good. I’m genuinely sick.
The Problem with Popplers
Fry: They’re like sex, except I’m having them.
Bender: I can’t stand idly by while poor people get free food. We have to sell them.
War is the H-Word-Season 2
Bender: This is the worst kind of discrimination: the kind against me!
A Tale of 2 Santas
Bender: Isn't it true you that you have been paid for your testimony?
Pramala: Yes. You gave me a dollar and some candy.
Bender: And yet you haven't said what I told you to say! How can any of us trust you?
Bendless Love
Bender: Sorry I'm not your lover boy Flexo, whom you love so much. You love any one even pretending to be him!
Angleyne: Maybe I love you so much I love you no matter who you are pretending to be.
Bender: Oh how I wish I could believe or understand that! There's only one reasonable course of action now: kill Flexo!
Bender: Flexo! Hey, sorry about being sent to that South American Turkish prison on account of mistaken identity because of me.
Cyber House Rules-Season 3
Bender: Son, daddy’s trying to score with a cheap floozy right now…
Orphan: Daddy Bender, we're hungry.
Bender: What's with you kids? Every other day it's food, food, food. [pause] Alright, I'll get you some stupid food.
Orphan: Can we have Bender Burgers again?
Bender: No. The cat shelter's on to me!
315 I Dated A Robot
Bender: Humans dating robots is sick. You people wonder why I'm still single? It's 'cause all the fine robot sisters are dating humans!
(At Fry): You’ve got metal fever boy. Stay away from our women!
A Leela Of Her Own-Season 3
Bender: Hey, you add a one and two zeros to that or we walk!
Leela: How much did you make me?
Bender: One hundred dollars.
Anthology of Interest I
Bender: Leela, I’m shocked. Food goes in the disposal, hair and flesh go in the trash.
Leela: Wait, so you don’t care that I murdered Hermes?
Bender: Not even a little. There’s nothing wrong with murder so long as you let Bender wet his beak.
Leela: You’re blackmailing me?
Bender: Blackmail is such an ugly word. I prefer extortion. The “X” makes it sound cool.
The 30% Iron Chef
Bender: I decline the title of Iron Cook and accept the lesser title of Zinc Saucier, which I just made up. Uhh... also, comes with double prize money.
Love and Rocket-Season 4
Bender: Fry, in order for me to get busy at maximum efficiency, I need a big 400 ton bootie.
Bender: With my mighty robot powers, I can get sick of things much faster than you humans.
Jurassic Bark
Fry: You can see how I lived before I met you.
Bender: You lived before you met me?!
Fry: Yeah, lots of people did.
Bender: Really?!
Obsoletely Fabulous
I'm sorry, guys. I never meant to hurt you. Just to destroy everything you ever believed in.
The Devil’s Hands Are Idle Playthings
Bender: You may have to "metaphorically" make a deal with the "devil." And by "devil," I mean Robot Devil. And by "metaphorically," I mean get your coat.
Spanish Fry
Lrr: I thought the nose was the human wang?
Bender: No sir chief. The main event, so to speak, is near the wallet. Ever seen soccer players line up at a goal? They aint protecting their noses, I tell ya.
Lrr: Hmm, this jerk chicken is quite good. I think I’ll have Fry’s lower horn jerked.
Bender: It’s used to it! Whoo!
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